Eccentric and Bent

Come on a fantastic voyage in the backwaters of my mind.

Category Archives: Loss

DAP


She wore her scars like armor but if you got passed it, it was amor. Battle ready at all times but full of that LOVE DIVINE. The battle between light and dark is damn sure what gave her that spark. A smile on her lips could disguise the murder in her eyes. See she could kill your dreams with kindness, never a cruel intent, she was just a warrior that said exactly what she meant. And if you crossed her, it was yours to bear. Call up your gods, say a prayer but to her love nothing compared. Like a roller coaster with dips and crests, she lived this life, doing her best. And finally she is at rest.

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DAP!


In urban lingo, dap is a hand bump that can replace an handshake or be the symbol of agreement, excitement or even just showing love. But in my personal life, those are were my aunt’s initials. She wasn’t but a few years older than me; she was the baby out of my Grandmother’s 18 children. Even still, she was an aunt and not my contemporary. I used to dream of being old enough to follow her on her adventures with my Cousin Toni. When I finally reached what I thought was an appropriate age, she shut me down quick. 😄 She told me she had bigger plans for my future than following in her footsteps, so I could just sit my little butt on the porch. Although I was taller than her 4’8″, I did just what she said because I was not about to tangle with that wild cat. Last November, during my Grandmother’s last days, I found out how truly ill my aunt was. Besides the Lupus she’d been battling, she also had a liver damaged beyond repair. She told me she probably wouldn’t make it until the next November. I worried but figured she’d kick death’s butt if it showed up at her door. I mean she had been kicking butt and taking names my whole life. She even made Ice Cube (yeah the rapper) take heed when they dated back in the vintage days. She was a ball of love though. She never lacked having an encouraging word, a smile, a hug or Love for any who needed it. She was one of my heroes. But this week, she was needed elsewhere so she left us behind with tears and smiles on our faces. We won’t ever forget all the advice, love, laughs and shenanigans. Nor will we forget that she taught us to live out loud and with joy. So while I’m pasting the pieces of my heart back together, I’m also planning to celebrate the time I was given. I am also grateful that I had the chance to tell her how much she truly meant to me and to hear her say she loved me too. She told me that she was proud of me. I just regret I didn’t get to hear her say “auntie’s baby!” to me one more time. But she put enough love into each exclamation, that I should be able to hold onto it for the rest of my life. I just wish I could get one more DAP.
In loving memory of Doree Ann Primous

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